midlife crisis when the fog lifts

Like I said in my first post, we decided Sunday he would move out. I told him he isnt even sorry about it and he got really mad. When were home together and hanging out, things are fine. Deal with your stress and anxiety in a productive way. You are dealing with so many things narcissistic tendencies, someone not dealing in reality, porn addict etc. He says he knows he was wrong and he wishes he had never even given in to affair, etc, but that he felt unappreciated in our marriage and wishes he had spoken up. He told me he didnt want that, and that he wanted to stay with me and our daughter. I hope he comes to his senses. You were hurting me, but I wasnt aware of it. Ive been working in the office for a new site launch at work and it feels good to be with people, but everyday around 1-2pm I would get VERY emotional. He makes sly comments sometimes. As hard as it is to come home everyday to a house completely alone without him, I know i have to stick to it. I absolutely do NOT want to divorce him, I love him more than anything, but I just dont even know this person right now sometimes. I told him he told me he would give me money weekly and finish the things around the house and he hasnt stuck to his word. Because that is something I will have to handle differently. It is Friday now so I really dont know when ill see him, if he will come home and hang out at a normal time, or if he will stay out until 3am, or if tonight will be the night he chooses to not come home at all and test that outHe is being very nice to me, he seems positive when hes around me and its like were roommates that get along great and raise a baby together and a dog. If not see ya. He left very early this morning for work and will be gone for 2 nights working in another city. He told me I only married him to spite my parents. I completely committed to 180 and immediately started feeling better. If thats what he wants then he should go have it, bc I know im better than all of it. For you I dont know how to get you out of limbo except 180. What makes my situation different is that my H came home and admitted the affair. With therapy and support and this blog, I have confidence in myself. For a stupid infatuation. I wish I had not been so trusting. (so untrue but whats the point), I said Okay, well YOU DONT, bc youre NOT HERE. YOU let him contact you. Im focused on myself and my kids and he continues to hate me and blame me for everything. And I wont back down. That is the first issue. I am DETERMINED to be happy with or without him, but I would be MUCH HAPPIER with him. They may have convinced themselves that their marriage was already bad, that their partner really didnt love them, and that the affair partner must truly be their soulmate because he or she is the only one who understands them. You are not forgetting. He never expected I would call the OW that night (before the D conversation) so I knew he had been cheating. I cant live every single day not knowing where his head is and then have him come here every night like were a family. Then he went on again to say he would be out of the house asap and asked how we will go about scheduling the baby. Doug: Or they get mad, and they get defensive. Free therapy advice that could save your sanity. But it was not even close to your situation. He came over last night to see the baby and I went out to dinner with friends. The only thing I can say is that I did not make a fool of myself or start drinking or acting like I was having a midlife crisis.

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